Self-provocative questions. Three ways to get to know yourself better Comprehend the question
These questions will help you understand what really matters to you, what you have been running from all your life and where your real dreams live.
Ask them yourself, listen to yourself, change your life!
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1. If I could leave only one memory from my whole life, which one?
I love this question! He crystal-clear shows what can be called the most important in our life. People answering this question suddenly realize what the main moments of their life were: time spent with family; moments related to your favorite hobby or travel.
2. If my life was a film, how would I like to continue it?
One day a friend of mine saw this question written on misted glass and it changed his life. After him, he quit his unloved job and decided to devote all his time to his hobby, which has now made him one of the most famous people in the city.
And if your life was a film, how would you like to continue it?
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3. What would I do if I knew exactly what I would do?
The main question to ask yourself. It shows exactly what you would be doing if you did not have fears, excuses and other ridiculous reasons that you want.
4. What is so?
Buddhist monk Tit Nath Khan once said that we too often ask ourselves the question "What's wrong?", Concentrating on the negative. Our life would be much happier and more sincere if we asked ourselves: "What is so?" The answer to this question allows us to be grateful at least for the fact that we woke up this morning, in contrast to the 160 thousand people who did not open their eyes today.
5. What achievements am I proud of?
Make a list of things you can be proud of. You can even add such seemingly insignificant things as, for example, there. When you see your pride on paper, your self-worth will jump up.
6. What did my parents, in my opinion, have not given me?
Asking yourself this question, you will see what you will strive for all your life. If you think that you were disliked as a child, then your whole life you will run after other people in an attempt to get love from them.
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7. How should my parents never behave with me?
By answering this question, you will see situations from which you will run your whole life. For example, my friend thinks that my mother was too protective of her. And now she even perceives ordinary self-care as overprotective and goes crazy.
8. What are the three main mistakes in my life I do not want to repeat?
They say that the rake is divided into two types: 1) which teach something and 2) my favorites. Think, and what "your favorite rakes" are repeated from year to year?
9. My best decision in the last five years is ...
Five years ago I made the decision to quit beautiful life and working on television in Moscow for the sake of a ghostly dream - to become a writer. I packed my things and left for my hometown of Ufa. Now I have already published two books that have become bestsellers. is to believe the quiet voice of your heart and follow it. And you?
10. In favor of my dream, I am ready to give up ...
If you want to achieve something, then you have to sacrifice something. They say that discipline is the ability to do what you don't really want in order to get what you really want. So what are you willing to sacrifice?
11. What are my free sources of inspiration?
In our material world, it is believed that the higher the price for something, the cooler it is. But the most sincere things are still free: a walk in the fresh air, solitude in the mountains, hugs with loved ones, laughter and smiles, good books(not free, but quite inexpensive).
12. Imagine that there is a self-assessment meter. From what actions does the level of the self-esteem increase?
It is strange, but true: very often our self-esteem depends on specific actions. When we do what we love; when we challenge ourselves; when we take care of ourselves, it all raises our level of self-love.
What do you need to do to feel good?
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13. Which people fill me up and which ones empty me?
I must admit that neither good nor bad people can not be. There are those, being near which makes us stronger and fills us. And there are those with whom it destroys us. Who from your environment belongs to the first category, and who to the second?
14. Who do I envy?
On my project "Selfquest" there is a special assignment where I ask you to write a list of people whom you envy. Envy - interesting feeling, which most often shows a subconscious desire to have the same as that of the object of envy. Envy must be transformed into a constructive emotion in order to understand what we want.
15. What annoys me about other people?
What we see in other people is ours. What other people see in us is theirs. So the easiest list to find out your weaknesses is to understand.
16. Which of your loved ones would you like to see at your bedside when you die?
One day I was struck by a question from the famous business thinker Yitzhak Adizes, who watched his mother die in a hospital bed. He asked himself: “Who would I like to see at my bedside on my deathbed? Why not get rid of those people whom I do not want to see at my bedside, dying, right now? " Just think about it.
Answer honestly to the question: do I have such moments?
18. What will I regret most in my old age?
Regrets are ranked around the world every year. Elderly people are asked: "What do you regret the most?" All over the world, these ratings are almost always the same. Most of all, people regret that they have worked all their lives in an unloved job, lived with unloved people, traveled little and did not take care of their health.
What will you regret in old age?
19. Describe your life until today in 6-9 words.
As part of my writing course, Texture, I always ask participants to do a thing related to the story of Ernest Hemingway. He bet that he will write a six-word story that will make people cry. The story was like this: “Children's shoes are on sale. New. " These are the witty and sad things my students wrote: “Have I really found myself? Writing. I'm only 37 "," She believed that she could. Therefore I could ”,“ I'm 33. Sell 2 boards and nails ”.
What does your life look like in 6-9 words until today?
20. What does it mean to be happy for me?
And answer this question yourself, without prompts.
Most people have never asked themselves these questions. And if they did, they did not try to find a truthful answer to them. It's not even the answer itself, but the process of finding it. Each of these questions can prompt you to think about yourself and the world around you, even if you do not find the answer. They are able to get someone off the ground and make them think about what they usually do not want to think about.
The order of the questions does not really matter, they are given in the order in which they came to mind. Although several questions that follow each other can be logically related. There is no need to dwell on the formulation of a question and the search for an answer to it. First of all, you have to start thinking and this is the main task that is invested in them. Therefore, there is no need to look for any hidden background in the wording. Just ask them yourself and think, watch your responses, reactions and feelings.
I warn you, many questions are inconvenient, they can hurt your vanity, lead to an understanding of something unpleasant, but you need to ask yourself, because your problems cannot be simply ignored. And it is better to ask them yourself now, to think carefully and come to some decision or conclusion, than to reap the consequences of delusions and wrong choices later.
Let these questions lead to different feelings, but the purpose of these questions is not to upset you, but to induce certain actions. Do not get used to problems, but find a solution for them! Many of these questions I have asked and are asking myself, and they help me to know myself deeper and, using this knowledge, move on.
Do not rush to dismiss, because any question carries a multi-stage system of answers, conclusions, solutions and rechecking you again, refusal of unnecessary and some efforts where necessary.
For example:
If I understand that it is difficult for me to communicate with some people, then I usually think about how to avoid it. Does it help me, what is the difficulty, what am I not correct myself, what am I running from, where am I hiding, what needs to be changed in myself, what is my fear? Etc…
Or ... If I understand that I am lazy, then I think about how to strengthen discipline. Why am I lazy, what is laziness, what does it protect and what it helps me in, maybe this is one of the necessity and inhibition of something in which I am incorrect, or vice versa - how does it help me and what is the result when I do something, I think it over and am in no hurry to do it right away, why am I blaming myself?
There can be many sub-questions - but this is exactly what is needed to break out of the chain of excuses, delusions and ignorance - everything is in your interests!
You don't have to answer all of them at once. You may have to think carefully. Do not rush to immediately give an answer to the question, it may turn out to be a stereotyped answer due to the stereotypes that have developed in your thinking. These stereotypes are designed to simplify your thinking and keep your ego from self-blame. They work instantly, offering you the most psychologically “comfortable” response. But such an answer does not mean honest and correct. Therefore, take the time to reflect, try to get to the bottom of it and be as honest with yourself as possible.
Hint: Most of the problems are in you, not in outside world... And these problems can be solved by working on yourself.
Some questions include approval. For example, "why do you smoke?" If you do not smoke, skip the question, this does not apply to you. The same goes for all such questions.
Some questions may puzzle some, but leave other people indifferent. This is fine. You cannot predict in advance which path your chain of thought will take and what will attract your attention.
- Why should I be concerned about other people's opinion of myself?
- How do acquaintances treat me?
- Why can't I be alone?
- Why do I drink alcohol?
- Why am I shy and shy?
- How do my family and children treat me?
- Why is it difficult for me to make acquaintances?
- Should I be absolutely better at everything than the rest?
- Is fate unfair to me?
- Why do I use foul language?
- What is happening in the world and how does this relate to me?
- What is happening in my country, what I do not like, how it concerns me and what can I personally fix?
- What is going on at my job, what I do not like, how it concerns me and what can I personally fix?
- What is the meaning of my life, what do I want from life?
- Why are my plans and dreams not coming true?
- Am I happy with my choice?
- How do I make decisions?
- Why am I worried and nervous?
- Who is responsible for what happened in my life this way and not otherwise?
- Who is responsible for making me this way?
- Is it really that life path, which I have chosen for myself, the only possible one?
- What prevents me from living the life I want to live?
- How did I come up with the idea that I really needed to live?
- Does anyone owe me anything?
- Do I owe something to someone?
- Why am I swearing? What's the point of this? What do I want to prove? Are there other ways to resolve the conflict?
- Am I coming to something of value as a result of these conflicts?
- Why are my emotions getting the best of me?
- Am I an emotional or unemotional person? What's the difference?
- What are emotions?
- I have a bad mood, laziness and apathy. So what? And what is it, what is the mechanism?
- Why do I need a tenth dress or a third watch in my dreams?
- What will happen to me in ten, twenty, thirty years?
- Will my life somehow change if I keep doing what I'm doing?
- Am I satisfied with these prospects?
- What will happen to my health if I continue to lead the lifestyle that I am leading now?
- What will happen to me when I grow old?
- What if I can't find pleasure in the things that give me joy now (sex, food, drink)?
- I like my job?
- Am I satisfied with my job as a source of income and my life's work?
- Why can't I organize other sources of income?
- What happens if I lose my job?
- Why don't I work remotely?
- Why am I not running my business?
- Am I less fortunate than others?
- What will I do this weekend? What about the next ones? What do I do every weekend?
- Why do I smoke?
- How do I rest, do I have enough rest?
- What do I do in my free time?
- Do I have enough free time?
- Am I getting enough sleep?
- Where am I in a hurry all the time?
- Do I know how to fill my free time?
- Am I fit?
- I feel good?
- How does it feel great for me?
- Where is my focus?
- Can I stay focused?
- How to eat right for me?
- Do I devote enough time to loved ones?
- Why am I late at work?
- What happens if I leave on time?
- Why do I practice this particular religion and not another, what do I really know about it?
- Are all other religions wrong?
- Am I diligently fulfilling the commandments of my faith? If not, how can I be sure of the salvation of my soul?
- What is the use of suffering?
- What am I interested in, what are my interests, hobbies, how much time do I devote to this?
- How much time do I spend on social media?
- How long do I watch TV?
- How many books have I read in the last year?
- What other interesting music is there?
- Am I educated and erudite enough?
- What do I know about my kind?
- What do I dislike about my parents and how does it manifest in me?
- How do I feel about my mother?
- How do I feel about my father?
- Do I help my parents?
- I say the words "I love you" to my parents, to a loved one, children?
- What is a person made of?
- What is genetics?
- What is an atom made of?
- How many foreign languages I know and use?
- How do I respond to criticism directed at me?
- When was the last time I agreed with someone else's opinion, which was different from mine and openly admitted it?
- What is the point in those disputes in which each participant does not want to accept the opinions of the other? Is truth born in such disputes?
- Why would I need to prove something to someone?
- When was the last time I praised people, did I give them sincere compliments?
- How am I better than the people I don't like?
- Why do some people dislike me?
- Why do they love me?
- Why do I love those whom I love?
- Have I put in enough strength to recognize my strengths and get rid of my shortcomings?
- How long have I given gifts just like that, for no reason?
- How long have I visited my elderly relatives?
- Are there many people who will give me selfless help if I need it?
- When was the last time I cleaned my house?
- How often do I stay alone and reflect on life?
- When was the last time I did something that others did not approve of, and in the end I was left happy with my choice?
- Am I getting things done?
- Do I have a developed sense of humor?
- Do I like to sarcast and troll others?
- Am I enjoying my life?
- Am I happy?
- Do I often complain about life?
- Why do I consider my problems so significant and serious?
- What am I doing to improve my life?
- Why do wars happen?
- Where do my fears come from?
- Why should I be offended by others?
- Why would I pretend to be who I really am not and who I really am?
- What are my biggest mistakes in life?
- What is my destiny?
- Why am I lonely?
- How do my principles, my worldview help me?
- How to understand yourself?
- How to find yourself?
- How to be yourself?
- How to understand yourself?
- What is it like to live consciously?
- How to live on?
- How to find goals in life?
- How to understand and find your purpose in life?
- How to get satisfaction and recognition in life?
- How to change your life?
- How to live your life?
- How to realize yourself?
- How to set up your personal life?
- How to survive betrayal and betrayal?
- How to get through a crisis in personal relationships?
- How to get rid of attachment and addiction?
- How to get out of depression?
- How to get rid of the feeling of fear?
- How can I communicate correctly?
- How and what kind of business to do?
- What kind of people are my friends? Why are we together?
- What determines my behavior?
- What is good and what is bad for me?
- Am I listening carefully to other people?
- Am I sensitive to others?
- Am I tough in making decisions?
- How much suffering have I caused to others?
- Am I ashamed of my loved ones?
- What do I know about death?
- What am I most afraid of?
There may be many such questions, but if you have reached the end of this list and were able to honestly answer them for yourself, draw conclusions and slightly change your perception of life, outline a plan for the reconstruction of your life - this is a very serious act!
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You've probably had situations when you wanted to get to know a person better, but did not know what questions to ask him, so as not to seem rude or incorrect. This led to embarrassment and missed opportunities in the end. We all went through this: when someone is interesting to us, it is not always clear how to break the ice. If you really want to get to know someone, you need to learn how to ask the right questions. Whether it's a date or meeting a colleague at work, it's helpful to have a few pieces ready.
Experienced communicators know that the right question at the right time can work wonders. He will help start a conversation, get to know the person better, achieve goals. Asking questions is an important key to many effective ones.
The questions collected below are powerful enough in themselves. But how can you make the best use of this list? Here are some important tips to help you not only strike up, but also successfully continue the conversation.
Don't ask one question after another... Let the conversation unfold. Give your interviewee enough time to answer the question. The essence of the conversation is not how many questions you have time to ask.
Don't switch from one topic to another... Remind yourself that this is not a job interview where you quickly switch between subjects. Let the topic unfold naturally.
Show real interest... If you are really interested in this topic, your interlocutor will notice it.
Ask consistent questions... You can avoid moving on to other topics if you engage the other person with a question that flows smoothly from the previous answer of the other person.
Accentuate... Don't talk about everything you know. The message you are trying to convey or the question you want to ask must be accurate and concise.
Here are some good questions that can help you have interesting conversations and build deep connections with those around you.
Questions
If you had a card that saves you from trial for a crime, which one would you commit?
This profound question will introduce you to the darker side of the interlocutor. Interestingly, there is almost no person who will simply tell you that he will not use this card. When the interlocutor answers this question, there is an opportunity to talk about this topic for quite a long time. For example, why did he choose this particular crime?
What book or movie has influenced you the most?
Everyone has a book or movie that has influenced them greatly. By using this question, you will get very interesting information about the personality of the person you are talking to. You will not only find out which genres he likes best, but also what work he distinguishes from the rest, which can already give a lot of topics for further conversation.
What would you give your life for?
Of course, this question should not be approached to a stranger and certainly not asked right away - he is not particularly carefree. Using it, you should understand that you can get a lot of interesting information about the interlocutor, and push him away, having the reputation of an eccentric.
If you could be a character in a book or a movie, what would it be?
This particular question will give your discussion partner a brain twister. And let's be honest, is it frustrating to imagine that you can live in the imaginary world of your favorite book or movie?
At the same time, the answer to this question will tell you a lot about this person's personality. In almost all cases, he will choose a character that is very similar to him - the person with whom he identifies himself.
If you could travel back in time, where would you go?
Admittedly, this is a very tricky question to ask if a person has an interest in history. In this case, even a superficial response can be developed.
If you could change one thing from your past, what would it be?
Talking about the past touches everyone. Of course, there is a chance that a person will say that he would not want to change anything, but even in this case, you can use and ask something like: "What, would you not even want to change your hairdresser?"
If you had superpower, what would it be?
The question is not as stupid as it might seem. As a rule, people call such superpower that they really lack in life. That is, the question has a very strong connotation.
The answer will help you draw a conclusion about the identity of the interlocutor. After all, is he going to use his power solely for selfish ends, or is there something social in his desire?
Who was your childhood hero?
By asking this question, you can learn a lot about a person's personality. Do not forget to ask a counter question about what his current hero is.
What would you do during a zombie apocalypse?
There are people who would hide, and there are those who would fight. This simple question will help you move on to more informal communication, get to know the interlocutor. The chain of reasoning in this case is able to show how a person is ready for difficult non-standard tasks, how he thinks.
If you could live anywhere, what kind of place would it be?
Here there is a risk of running into commonplace answers (desert island, New York). But it is quite possible that you will receive a comprehensive answer. For example, you will understand that a person has long wanted to move, but he cannot. This is interesting topic for discussion.
What do you think is the best comedy you've watched?
Not only can this question help you get some good recommendations for your list of movies to watch, but it can also provide great conversation topics and tell you if the other person has a sense of humor and what kind.
Would you buy a one-way ticket to Mars?
Mars and Musk are of interest to many today. Someone says that all this is meaningless, others argue that this is the most interesting and amazing adventure in the history of mankind.
If you had a chance, would you choose a different profession?
Asking a person about where he works is boring. It is always much more interesting to talk about “If only…”. Half of the previous questions are based on this. People love speculation, especially about a better life.
Most likely, a person has a dream about a new profession, which he will tell about. And then you can already ask other questions on the same topic.
What makes you truly happy?
Asking this question - great way make friends and other acquaintances. Usually people talk about the little things first. They will tell you that listening to music or hanging out with their friends is what makes them happy. But once you start to dig deeper, you will find a lot of interesting things.
We wish you good luck!
Toilet paper, pasta, canned food, soap are just a few of the items that are rapidly disappearing from supermarket shelves in the midst of the coronavirus outbreak. Let's call a spade a spade: these are not out-of-necessity purchases, but panic purchases. And although this is a completely understandable reaction of people to an uncertain situation, it does not affect the lives of others in the best way.
The level of self-esteem in one way or another affects a person's actions. A person constantly underestimates his capabilities, as a result, "life prizes" go to others. If your self-esteem goes lower and lower, then there are 20 tips given in this article to help you. By starting to apply them in your life, you can increase your self-esteem and become a confident person.
Many will agree that, from time to time, they are overcome by unwanted thoughts that cannot be gotten rid of. They are so strong that even doing an interesting job does not help at all. This is accompanied by negative emotions that add excruciating sensations. Sometimes it seems that it is not possible to defeat such thoughts, but if you look at the problem from different points of view, you can find the right solution.
We are killing our happiness with our own hands. The negative that we carry in ourselves towards others, destructive thoughts, envy, anger, resentment - this list is endless. Review your life, release unpleasant memories, get rid of people, activities and things that poison your mind. Tune in to goodness and positiveness. Do something nice, something you've been dreaming about for a long time.
A person's life changes with age, desires and priorities change. This is a completely normal process, although each of us is different. If you want to make the most of your life after 30 years, the following 9 tips will help you.
Fighting complexes is often very difficult due to lack of motivation. And in order to achieve the maximum effect in the fight against complexes, it is necessary to develop for yourself the tactics of finding the necessary motivation and further action... It is on this joint work that the principle of working on oneself is built.
Happiness - no matter what anyone says, the goal of every person's life. But is it really that difficult to achieve this goal? People strive to become happy, but they neglect simple joys, which together can give this feeling. Here are some ways to help you feel happier.
Do you want to become a healthy person? If you follow the advice given in this article, then it is safe to say that you will become healthier than you were before. At first glance, they seem simple, but start doing them and you will be amazed. real changes in your health and condition.
Touchiness is not an incorrigible, pathological character trait, it can and should be corrected. Resentment is a person's reaction to not meeting their expectations. It can be anything: a word, an act, or a sharp glance. Frequent grievances lead to bodily illness, psychological problems and the inability to build harmonious relationships with others. Do you want to stop being offended and learn to understand your offenses? Then let's take a look at how you can do this.
These 50 questions help you find yourself and better understand who you really are. Ask them for yourself and you can clear your mind and life from unnecessary things. There are no wrong answers to these questions, everyone chooses his own path. And it also happens that a correctly posed question is already the answer.
50 questions to help you understand yourself
- You don't know your age. So how many years will you give yourself?
- Which do you think is worse: fail or never try?
- Life is short. Why do you do so many things that you don't like, but so few that you like?
- You finished the job. He said and did everything. So what was more - talking or doing?
- You are only allowed to change one thing in the world. What will it be?
- Imagine happiness is the currency. What job will make you the richest person?
- Do you do what you believe in or believe in what you do?
- If people lived for an average of 40 years, what would you change to get the most out of your life?
- How much control do you have in your life?
- What do you like best: doing things right or doing the right things?
- If your acquaintances begin to humiliate your friend behind his back, not knowing that you are friends with him, what will you do?
- You have the opportunity to give just one piece of advice in a lifetime to a young child. What are you going to tell him?
- Can you break the law to save your loved one?
- Have you seen madness where you later saw genius?
- Are you doing something different in your life than others?
- Why do some things make you happy while other people don't?
- You probably once wanted to do something, you never dared. What's stopping you?
- Why are you holding on to things that are long overdue to let go?
- You have the opportunity to permanently move to another country. Where would you move? Why?
- Do you push the elevator button multiple times? Do you really think he'll come faster?
- Which is better: happy stupidity or grief from the mind?
- Why are you are you?
- Would you like the kind of friend you are for your friends?
- What would you choose: moving your best friend to another camp or for him to live nearby, but you stopped communicating with him?
- What are you grateful for in your life?
- Now you have a choice: to lose all your past memories, or never have new ones. What will you choose?
- Can you get the truth without fighting?
- What would happen if you made your biggest fear a reality?
- Do you remember how upset you were 5 years ago? Does it matter now?
- Do you have the happiest childhood memory? Why exactly it?
- What in your past made you feel real, alive?
- If not now, then when?
- If you haven't achieved it yet, what have you got to lose?
- Did you get the impression that it was the best conversation of your life, but you and the other person were silent?
- Religion preaches love. Why is there so many wars in the world because of her?
- Can you separate the good from the bad in this world without a shadow of a doubt?
- You were given a million dollars. Will you quit your job?
- Do you have a choice: have a little work to do or a lot of work to be done?
- Do you have a feeling that today has already been repeated hundreds of times?
- When was the last time you started a business with only the germ of an idea, but already strongly believed in it?
- If all the people you know die tomorrow, who will you visit today?
- Would you trade 10 years of your life for worldwide fame and attractiveness?
- What is the difference between life and existence?
- When is the time to take risks and do what you think is right?
- We learn from our mistakes, why are we afraid to make them?
- If no one judges you, what will you start doing differently?
- When was the last time you listened to your breathing or heartbeat?
- What do you like? Did your last actions express this love?
- Can you remember what you have been doing every day for the past 5 years?
- Do you make decisions yourself or does someone decide for you?
Makes you wonder, doesn't it? Reread these questions to help you choose the right way and do not what you need to do, but what you think is right.
