How men are deprived. How boys lose their virginity
Haven't you had to? And thank God.
Depriving a man of virginity is a hundred times more difficult than doing the same with a girl.
However, my dears, we will not swear: life ahead is long and eventful, who knows, maybe you will still have to teach young people our old man's sexual techniques and methods. Lucky that guy who is initiated into the magical secrets of the female body by an experienced and understanding woman. Oh, lucky!
We will not consider with you a typical case of loss of virginity by a man: both are young, both inexperienced, both obey only instincts and secretly read books. This state of affairs is absolutely natural and does not require any outside help.
Let's pay attention to those guys who for some reason fell out of the natural course of events and remained innocent until the age at which their peers are already having children with might and main.
Why does a man remain a virgin? The reasons can be very different, and, accordingly, virgins are very different.
"Sissy"... From childhood, the domineering and oppressive mother had instilled in him that all women in the world needed only to straighten a man, jump into his bed, get pregnant and put a stamp in their passport. This same mother tried to tell what all the women are fools and bitches. She carefully protected her boy from any contact with fools and bitches. And since such boys most often do not have a dad, there is no one to direct them to the true path (well, except for the experienced, wise women they met on the path of life).
"Botanist"... At first he had no time, then - ashamed, then - completely ashamed, because everyone already knows how, but he still does not. Not only that: his evil schoolmates also laughed at him more than once for this. He is very insecure, afraid of women like fire, hates them for it, is rude and speaks down. Just because he is afraid of being ridiculed. The case is difficult, requiring the intervention of a good woman with the practical skills of a psychotherapist.
"Not macho"... And there are also guys who, for the time being, just don't need it all. Not interested. Doesn't pull. They have some kind of hormone and maturation processes that are not going on like most. They begin to take an interest in sex so late that their peers (oh, these cruel and soulless peers!) Cannot become interested in them due to their employment with family problems, and young fairies are very scared.
What to do if a virgin falls into your gentle and experienced hands? 
Never give up the chance! If everything goes well, your pupil will remain the most devoted, caring, most tender friend of yours for life, and even if you do not become long-term lovers, no one will take your place in his heart. And what else does a woman need if not a worthy place in a man's heart?
So, step one... In no case do we insist on intimacy. No transparent hints, flaunting lace lingerie, candles and other sexually explicit details. He will be frightened and withdrawn into himself.
Wait for the initiative from him, skillfully stimulating it with an unobtrusive atmosphere, joint viewing of explicit films, and favorable situations.
Step two: do not ask or talk about the ex. He simply did not have them, and if he did, they wounded him in the heart, and yours will certainly insult him: he is in complete confidence that everyone who was with you "before" was better.
Step three: as soon as "begins", be careful: do not rush at him with the passion of a tigress and the zeal of a Stakhanovite. Slowly, calmly, gently, moderately passionate. The main task is to make him understand that his touch, his breath, his body are driving you crazy.
Step four: the initiative is in your hands. Do not expect commands from him - command yourself.
And one more thing: no jokes! Only seriously, only positively, only tenderly. And so - the first five times. Then he will grow up, become a big boy and will certainly thank you. Hope.
Everyone in adolescence or adolescence is faced with the first intimacy... And there are many questions how it happens, when is it better to do it, is it painful to lose virginity. In a circle of friends, an endless and exciting discussion of this topic begins. Rarely does anyone go with such a question to their parents because of their embarrassment. But if a girl goes to a pediatric gynecologist, then it is he who answers her questions and brings her up to date.
Methods for revealing a man's innocence
Once Leonid Utyosov sang: "Love will accidentally appear when you don't expect it at all ..." You are walking the streets and suddenly you meet the very same person. A spark instantly flares up between you, you paint a picture of an ideal future, the relationship is slowly developing. But it doesn't go further than kissing, as the guy is delaying the moment of intimate connection. An exciting question immediately arises in my head: is he really an inexperienced virgin? In fact, he may have high moral values and he is not eager to sleep with you. But these guys can be counted on one hand, but there are a huge number of virgins.
Types of virgin guy
There are 4 types of virgin guys:
However, it is possible to build relationships with each of these species.
Recognition by communication and behavior
Before you sleep with a guy, you must first talk to him, and then it will not be difficult to recognize him as a virgin. Usually guys who have no sexual experience will shy away from topics related to sex. But not all virgins are like that - some have such a strong surge of hormones that they will do their best to make you believe that they are sexy monsters.
Therefore, first talk to him about frank topics and look at his reaction - an unrestrained guy can be a virgin, although he may be shy of you. A guy who is too free in his actions should alert you: either he is preoccupied, or he is trying to prove something to you. Usually virgins communicate modestly with the opposite sex. A mature kid will not be afraid:
The virgin will delay this moment, avoid caresses and intimacy, kisses will be abrupt.
Haste with sex
In the modern world, sex is the luminary around which the world revolves. Therefore, adolescents want to quickly lose their innocence: it seems to them that in this way they will quickly become adults, confident, and will be on a par with those who already have this experience. The boys are actively discussing with each other how to quickly lose their virginity. Many choose to remain silent about their first failed experience. ... What to expect from the first intimacy? How do men lose their virginity?
Emotionally, so is the girl. The first intimacy is always so awkward and not very pleasant. Usually this is a completely random partner, both are confused, and the next day they say goodbye forever, without looking into each other's eyes. Psychosexopathologists believe that most guys do not have an orgasm during the first time: everything ends too quickly, so they do not understand whether they had "it" or not.
There are two factors that are responsible for a person's readiness for sexual intercourse. Reasoning from a physiological point of view, the appropriate age for deprivation of innocence for girls is 18-19 years, for boys - 19-20. Psychological readiness is born in each person in a different way. Despite all the courage of guys, emotionally they mature later than girls. Therefore, there is no need to rush. After all, the first unsuccessful experience can forever leave an imprint on further intimate life.
Innocence has different attributes depending on gender. Guys cannot provide physical evidence of deprivation of virginity. There are no films or muscle fibers. Therefore, the signs are of a psychological nature. It's different with girls. Almost everyone asks the question if it hurts to lose innocence.
For the first time, unpleasant sensations and even pain appear, the level of increase of which is considered individual. It's about the structure of the female body. Here girls have signs of deprivation of virginity - the presence of a hymen. It is a thin film of muscle fibers, small blood vessels and nerve endings that is located at the site of the labia majora and labia majora. Therefore, its rupture contributes to the appearance of unpleasant sensations and pain. Often the first time appears:
- bleeding
- abdominal pain,
- pain in the vaginal area.
However, this is not always the case.
Feelings during first sex
Relying on the individual structure of each, sometimes a virgin at the time of penetration does not feel anything that could be called unpleasant. This speaks of the elasticity of her hymen and the ability to expand without tearing. It also happens that a girl experiences severe pain during the first sexual intercourse..
This suggests that the hymen was deformed at the time of penetration of the penis into the vagina. Cracks and tears occur, which are the result of the appearance of pain and blood. Sometimes this happens due to abrupt or incorrect entry. Therefore, it is important not to rush during the first sexual intercourse, but to do everything slowly and carefully.
Do guys have pain of being deprived of their innocence? No, since there are no physical reasons... A virgin may experience discomfort or pain due to the individual structure of the penis. Any guy loses his virginity on his own when examining his body. And as a teenager, I tried masturbation on myself. The ideal age for deprivation of male virginity is considered to be from 18 to 20 years. But in practice, there are little womanizers. The psychology of guys is designed in such a way that they need to correctly enter their intimate life.
Intimate problems in many situations are associated with this awkward moment when something went wrong for the first time. At any age, it is difficult for a man to accept defeat. Since childhood, society has been giving boys specific guidelines. For example, a man should be the head of the family. Therefore, for such a case, it is better for an experienced girl to turn out to be a partner, who will treat his first time with understanding and help him to relax.
The ideal atmosphere for the first intimacy
Often in a couple, both partners are not devoid of virginity. And when that very hour comes, it is usually the girl who is visited by thoughts, whether it hurts to lose innocence. The responsibility falls on the shoulders of both partners. But if the guy is in charge in the relationship, then in the intimate process he will have to play the role of the dominant. It is important to carefully prepare for the process, to come up with everything to the smallest detail. A relaxing atmosphere will remove the stiffness. It is better to remove alcoholic drinks, noisy company and the possibility of unexpected intrusion of third parties into your room. The ideal option would be privacy so that no one interferes.
Of course, the first time may not be as perfect as you imagined it, but the fact that it will remain in your memory for a long time is for sure. It's hard to forget your first sex partner. Therefore, the loss of virginity is considered the main moment in the life of any person. There is an opinion that the sooner you lose, the less pain. It is wrong. Girls and guys who are virgins can ask a gynecologist. Usually the answer will be yes. Some are scared by this, after which they postpone their first time for later. The physical structure of a girl's body can be formed by the age of 14, but it is important to remember about psychological and emotional maturity.
Does it hurt to lose innocence at the age of 14 - this question is more likely to be related to a psychological state than a physical one. At the age of 14, girls fly in the clouds, they have already formed the concept of eternal and sweet love, they rush into the pool with their heads. Boys are unlikely to help, because in their thoughts they want to get closer to any girl. What love if 14 years is a time of experimentation. There are also romantics who dream of the sublime and magical. Such a person does not even part with virginity until he gets married or gets married. But in the conditions of the modern world, this is an exception.
Loss of innocence at 15
When the 14-year-old has successfully passed, the question arises as to whether it is possible to lose virginity at the age of 15. In theory, nothing has changed. This age is not suitable for the first sexual experiments. Psychologically, the girl and the boy are not yet ready for such emotional upheavals, and they leave a mark for life.
If you are concerned about the question of at what age to lose virginity, then the main thing here is to know when to stop.... Breaking up your virginity too early is not the best option. It is also not worth waiting until old age. Many have sex with a loved one with whom they want to live for the rest of their lives. It's great, but others are unlucky. Therefore, sex should take place with a person for whom there is sympathy or romantic feelings. After all, any pain will seem sweet when intimacy happens in the arms of a loved one.
It's no secret that our emotional state is governed by hormones. This is especially true of communication with an attractive person to us. Therefore, before starting to study his body before, during and after sex, it is worth considering that a guy's virginity is not a physiological factor, but a psychoemotional one. It is foolish to believe that after the first sex in the male reproductive system there will be any change, as happens in women during defloration. No, everything remains in place. But feelings and thoughts are undergoing a radical restructuring.
Still - after all, this is the formation of a man, his self-affirmation in the role of a male capable of satisfaction. And in the opinion of most guys, real sex with a woman is in many ways superior to masturbation in splendid isolation.
It is generally accepted that a guy loses his virginity only when he managed to successfully complete intercourse followed by ejaculation. Even if there was a penetration into the partner, but the case, for whatever reason, was not brought to an end - the guy is still a virgin.
How to determine a guy's virginity and how to behave in a girl?
No need to expect miracles in bed from a young inexperienced guy. If you have feelings for him, your task is to help cope with the excitement and surging emotions. There is no need to be offended if, immediately before sex, his erection disappears and he cannot satisfy you. On the contrary, this is one of the proofs that you are deeply sympathetic to him or that he is completely in love. If such an incident happened, you should not make scenes, be offended or think that your partner has problems with potency. Better to help him tune in the right way: calm down, hug and kiss, try manual stimulation or light flirting.
A loving and understanding girl, before depriving a guy of virginity, will take care of a cozy place in advance, where there will be soft dim light, a comfortable temperature, and a comfortable and soft bed. There is no need to give this event excessive importance and semi-officiality. You can turn on light relaxing music to relieve emotional stress. Offer your partner a glass of sweet wine or liquor to drink. Unleash your emotions and your bodies.
Almost every person, be it a man or a woman, remembers their first intimacy. What happens to a girl, both psychologically and physically, has been written and told more than one hundred times. And what do they feel at this moment? Let's try to figure it out.
Should I hurry?
Modern world culture is built on sex. He is everywhere: on TV screens, on computer monitors, on the billboards of our streets and even in games. Therefore, it is no surprise to anyone that guys are in such a hurry to get rid of innocence. Most of them believe that after the deprivation of virginity, adulthood begins. They will rise to a new stage of development, become self-confident. Therefore, men often lose their innocence as if by duress. Wanting to raise your status and self-esteem.
Among themselves, young people often discuss how men lose their virginity. Moreover, arguing on this topic, each of them is trying to hide their ignorance in this matter, and most importantly, their virginity. They are ashamed of their inexperience, which is understandable. Society and society put pressure on the guys, prompting them to constantly think about how to quickly get rid of innocence and become a "superhero". And, as you know, all ladies fall at their feet: from small to large. Naturally, these thoughts haunt you, and you need to hurry….
Will the expectations from the first mysterious time come true?
How do men lose their virginity? If you think about the psycho-emotional plan, then it is very similar to girls. The very first time is almost always a failure: the movements are awkward, and not too pleasant. It often happens that a girl, just a casual acquaintance, was a little shy, and, without looking up, dispersed.
So the guy thinks after that? And was there an orgasm?
Psychotherapists in the field of sexology are sure that most of men do not experience anything even like an orgasm. Because the act is very short, and it is impossible to determine what happened and how it ended.
Does a man lose virginity?
This question is of interest to many. Even schoolchildren know what happens in a woman's body. Everyone knows about existence But is there a similar invention of nature in guys? And does it hurt for men to lose their virginity? The guys have no hymen. Here, rather a psychological barrier. And it is not even known who is easier, a man or a woman to go through this "very first time". Because the nerves, for example, can play a cruel joke in the form of a lack of erection, or premature ejaculation.
The first intimate contact leaves a man's memory in the form of future addictions, gustatory representations or fetish.
Several interesting nuances about how men lose their virginity
If a girl is not a casual acquaintance, but a friend for a long time, then in order not to miscalculate and try to please both, it would be good to know for sure if she is a virgin too or not?
Warn or not?
The girl usually makes no secret of her innocence. She can proudly announce that this time will be the first and, therefore, the guy should be happy. Or say that she is quite an experienced and knowledgeable lady in sex. And the guy should be happy too (he thinks responsibility is greatly reduced). The girl is often doubly happy. Today it is almost impossible to meet a virgin man. Therefore, to present him with the basics of sexual pleasures will be taken for happiness. If, nevertheless, the girl is not familiar, and sex is planned, she must be warned about her innocence. It will be good if she knows how men lose their virginity.
Preparing the base and special protection (condoms)
Adults know sudden sex is cosmic. And a man should be ready for such surprises, like a Soviet pioneer (in the sense of "always ready"). Therefore, he is obliged to follow a few simple rules in order for any opportunity to end in bed.
As you know, life is built on accidents, so protection should always be carried with you. For a man, there seems to be no greater grief than anticipating sex and being left without it due to lack of means of protection. Accordingly, before that, at home, you need to practice how to quickly and efficiently donning a condom. According to the ancient tradition, its tip is pinched with fingers in order to release air, and then rolled to the base of the penis. Everything. But you need to learn how to do it quickly, as they say, with your eyes closed. For delay is not forgiven even for a beginner. By the way, there is no need to purchase protective elastic bands with bells and whistles. First you need to learn how to use and give (get) pleasure with ordinary condoms. Much later, you can try with antennae or vibrating rings.
Scientific masturbation
Do men lose virginity when masturbating? Experts have been arguing for decades. In the meantime, they argue, a man must learn to regulate the length of intercourse, and not break down at the very first movements. Therefore, you need to conduct lessons with your member. Teach him to control himself and wait for an orgasm for a long time. These lessons will be especially useful at the first penetration, when this alone is already an orgasm!
You can try the special Kegels technique. Her exercises strengthen the muscles of the pelvis and pelvic organs, which allows you to control urinary flow, and, therefore, the urge to end quickly.
And further. Once on a date, even a casual one, you need to be sure that the body is not overflowing with juices. For they will look for a way out simply from arousal, and orgasm can occur even before the onset of intercourse.
Your body and appearance need to be monitored.
Constantly, as a date can happen suddenly. The first thing a girl will pay attention to is clean legs, armpits and a pleasant aroma of a washed body.
Composure and calmness are second nature
If everything goes to the cherished goal, you need to understand that there is no need for panic. You need to be collected, calm and keep a cold mind. - this is not a reason for alarm or tomfoolery. Better to let the girl think that in front of her is actually a more experienced man. This is the most that can be done for her in this case.
Speed is useless!
How do men lose their virginity? Usually they act with pressure. This is stupid and wrong. Due to excessive arousal, orgasm occurs faster than intercourse begins. No man would want such an incident. Therefore, everything should be done slowly, sedately, with foreplay. How would a pro in this business do it.
You need to start by smelling her body.
Even from such an exciting matter as the loss of virginity, you need to derive pleasure. Therefore, already on the bed, you need to slowly start exploring her body, the taste of her lips, the exciting smell of her skin ...
Penetration
What happens when a man loses his virginity? On the one hand, it seems like nothing special, but on the other - a life full of new sensations and pleasures. Therefore, after a worthy foreplay, a man can proceed to active actions. But this does not mean that you need to accelerate. Also slowly and gently enter it. At this moment, they say, nature will tell you what to do. But in any case, the head should remain light, for you need control, first of all, over your sensations.
Conclusion
Well, and finally. In recent decades, a persistent stereotype has formed that young people are ashamed of their innocence and are preoccupied with the question of how men lose their virginity. Many of them are sure that only those who have lost their innocence become a real man.
And even women are convinced of this. But in reality, this is not the case. Polls have shown that guys just don't like to lose it. Moreover, more than one third of the respondents admitted that they constantly think about how men lose their virginity, and what do they feel at the same time? Many then plunge into deep depression. They are swallowed by gloomy thoughts that everything happened very quickly, and whether at least one of the partners was pleased.
After men lose their virginity, they dream not only of sexual pleasures, but also of long-term relationships. And they get very upset and yearn, not understanding why the girl is not interested in them.
Since childhood, their caring mothers told many girls: a man must be an adult and experienced, he chooses a woman, cares for her, conquers her, conquers. However, for some reason no one says where men should take this hardened experience, the ability to communicate with a woman, seduce her, be the best with her. Many men in their first sex understand and accept the simple rules of the game: no one owes anyone, it's just a romance.
And still, every virgin, no matter how much he wants the experience, still dreams of the first sex for great love. After all, thousands of experienced lovers and mistresses will not give the feeling of the first kiss for love, the first affection ...
The first sex should be for love (as well as the second and third, sex without love, this is something animal, it’s not even sex mating, sex, fuck, but not sex). A virgin can immediately turn out to be a great lover if it is naturally inherent in him, and a blockhead can have at least a thousand women and be a bad lover. Not necessarily virgins - they are scary, oblique and crooked comrades, which it is impossible to look at without trembling. Not necessary at all. Moreover, it cannot be said that these are exclusively senior schoolchildren and freshmen.
Incredible, but true: a person can live for five years in a dorm on the floor, where nineteen out of twenty rooms are female, and not get any sexual experience. It's just that the person did not make it an end in itself, moreover, rather quickly "became familiar" and became, as it were, a part of the interior, looking at which the girls simply did not have an idea that some kind of relationship was possible, except for friendship. Actually, bringing a person to bed may not be so easy, writes Sexyweek.ru.
Just with fifteen-year-old boys: they need to beckon with a finger. For virgin men who are naturally good lovers, what problems could there be? The fact that he cannot control his physiology at first (but he also has to learn this himself) plus the problem - to some extent - his virginity complex, which quickly evaporates if he sees that he can ... In any In the case of a virgin, it is preferable to explain that you cannot rush too much, that you need to behave (especially for the first time) gently and carefully and do the maximum yourself.
There is no need to expect any tender kisses, erotic massage and a long preliminary part: if a person has sexual hunger, then everything happens quite quickly and spontaneously. As a rule, nature still takes its toll, you just need to direct it in the right direction. It is much easier to work if you put the young man on his back and show all the practical moments on him. And not in one session, but in several.
Sometimes, during intercourse, a man's frenulum is torn - this will be an external sign that the guy is not virgin, but this can happen even not during intercourse. And then (when the basics are mastered) move on to other interesting details. For the first time, everything should be simple and understandable, without frills, otherwise a person will simply get confused in theory, blood will rush to the brain and ... in general, everything will end very sadly, but we seem to have already talked about psychological trauma.
What mistakes should be avoided?
First, we must not forget about ourselves. For the first time, a certain haste and lack of assembly is forgivable for a young man, then he should already want to learn and please the girl.
Third, suppress your maternal feelings. This is a completely ordinary man. Naturally, he will be remembered for the rest of his life, regardless of how everything goes on.
Fourth, don't have a serious relationship. Here, of course, look according to the circumstances. But a jealous young lady should know: sooner or later he will want to try sex with someone else, and nothing can be done about it. If you are careful, attentive and gentle, then you can arrange for yourself a completely pleasant romance, while adapting the boy to your own desires (which is much more difficult with those who have certain patterns), while knowing for sure that the young man will remember you with tenderness for life. And this, after all, is very pleasant. It's not about the fact that a virgin is not a virgin. It's about relationships between people. If people love each other, then virginity is not a decisive or critical moment.
Look for love, not sex! Sex can be learned! Learning to love is not possible ...
